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Get Outside

Lotte Vesterli on October 23, 2020

We all need some way of handling the stressful situations that life sometimes throws at us. In New York, some of their bars have apparently started offering axe throwing. Despite our Viking heritage, I haven’t heard of bars here in Denmark with that option on the menu.

But physical effort does have a useful balancing effect. If your work keeps you in front of a computer or a desk all week, the weekend is a time for you to use your body instead of your brain. Don’t just go to the gym and run on a treadmill. Do something outside where you get fresh outside and sunlight. I will take a walk and enjoy the fall colors. What will you do?

Step Back to get Perspective

Lotte Vesterli on October 22, 2020

I just let a buzzing insect out of my office. It had gotten in somehow and was now trying in vain to fly out through the window glass. It was unable to understand the invisible barrier holding it back, and kept trying the same thing.

We humans are not all that different. Sometimes, we realize we are not moving in the direction we want in our life, but respond by trying harder. When you have your nose against the glass, you cannot see it.

The power humans have, and insects don’t have, is the ability to step back from the situation. When you gain perspective, you can figure out what is holding you back and how to move forward. Sometimes, you are able to consider you situation yourself and find a solution. Sometimes, talking with a friend can help. And sometime, you need to talk to a professional  therapist. Don’t keep buzzing against invisible barriers. Get help. 

Talk to Someone

Lotte Vesterli on October 21, 2020

To stay healthy, you need to communicate with someone. Working from home removes the small talk that is part of a day in the office, and starting a video meeting is like going into a meeting room: The setting limits off-topic conversation.

If you live with someone, make sure to create time for conversation and don’t just spend the evening slumped in the sofa with a screen each. If you live alone, call someone on the phone for a chat. Again, video feels like a meeting. Just use an old-fashioned voice call. You can even call people while you take a walk and do two good things for yourself at the same time.

Time Away from Screens

Lotte Vesterli on October 20, 2020

China is stepping up the fight against bullying with a new law to protect children online. It says internet companies have to take “necessary measures” against cyberbullying, including blocking and deleting content.

The more internet companies do, the better. And if you’re the victim of cyberbullying you should use the tools to report bullying.

But what you really need is time away from screens. You need to process and heal from past trauma in order to stop bullying and ignore it when it does happen. I have my ABC method (Attitude, Breathing, Choices), and there are others. You are free to reach out to me at no cost to see how I can help you.

Schedule a time here: https://www.lottevesterli.com/intro-call/

Spend Your Time Wisely

Lotte Vesterli on October 19, 2020

A shiny new phone doesn’t improve your life. But new information can.

The time you spend reading about and thinking about things is time you cannot spend on important things, like good books, inspiring movies, or simply reflecting on your life.

Take a moment now to think about how you spend your time. Can you spend it just a little better this week than last?

Work outside

Lotte Vesterli on October 16, 2020

I’ll be doing some outside work at our summer cottage this weekend. There are always things to do in preparation for winter. If you live somewhere with a yard or a garden, spend some time doing work outside this weekend. If you don’t have an outside area that is your responsibility, pick up a trash bag and clean up an area close to where you live.

Physical tasks like raking leaves, chopping firewood, or felling trees gives you a feeling of satisfaction that intellectual work on your computer doesn’t. Do something with your body this weekend to start next week with a positive feeling of accomplishment.

Self-esteem Against Bullying

Lotte Vesterli on October 15, 2020

October is National Bullying Prevention Month, and there are also bullying prevention weeks and days. These efforts are misnamed and should be called “bullying awareness” instead. Preventing bullying is not something that happens in one day, week, or month.

To prevent bullying, and to lessen the impact when it does happen, we need to work on self-esteem. That is a long-term effort. Teachers can include it in the curriculum, but once we leave school, we are on our own. If you have been the victim of bullying, look for tools that help you improve how you feel about yourself.

Put Your Phone to Bed

Lotte Vesterli on October 14, 2020

I love how this Yale Professor has made a tiny bed for her phone. She recognized that she had a hard time turning it off at night, and found a way to put it to bed. She has shared this tip and four others for coping with anxiety and stress on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCQim9VrnDY.

Do you have a bed for your phone? Maybe you should have.

The Traveling Mindset

Lotte Vesterli on October 13, 2020

Traveling

Some people are missing travel so much that they will pay to eat in a parked A380 super jumbo. Singapore airlines quickly sold out the first dinners and have added more dates.

I enjoy traveling, but I actually don’t miss sitting on airplanes. What I enjoy is the mindset of traveling. Coronavirus limits our physical options, but it does not prevent us from enjoying the feeling of traveling. Make plans to travel somewhere, even if only just outside your city.

Set Goals for Every Day

Lotte Vesterli on October 12, 2020

If you are working from home, you don’t have the physical separation of work and leisure you have been used to. That can make the days run together, and lead to feeling disconnected and unenthusiastic about your life.

To fight this feeling, make sure you set goals with different timeframes. Each day should achieve a couple of mini-goals, and each week should have at least one goal. If your work doesn’t provide you with goals like this, you will have to make them up yourself. It doesn’t matter if they are private or professional goals. What is your goal for this week?