fbpx

Cut Your Risk of Dying Prematurely in Half

Lotte Vesterli on April 7, 2022

You don’t need 10,000 steps a day. But 7,000 steps a day cuts your risk of dying prematurely in half. A big meta-study published in The Lancet gathers data from 15 large studies. They conclude that mortality – your risk of dying in any given month – at 7,000 steps is only half that at 3,000 steps. Just getting to 5,000 steps still gives you a 30% improvement.

If you believe you are already taking 5,000 or 7,000 steps per day, I have bad news for you: You don’t. Most people significantly overestimate their activity level, and I did as well. There is only one way to know and increase your number of steps: Count them. Get an app for your phone, or use a smartwatch or fitness tracker. Some people find that the carefully designed “nudging” in an Apple Watch makes them much more likely to reach their goals. But you can get a good-enough fitness tracker for less than $50.

Set a goal of 7,000 steps and find a way to track your progress. You will find that it also improves your mood and your energy.

The Effort is Within Your Control

Lotte Vesterli on April 6, 2022

You control the effort, not the results. If there is anything in your life you want to change, you can take action today to move towards your desired goal. You might not know exactly what action to take. That is fine – then the action today is to determine what action you need to take tomorrow.

You are not in full control of what direction your life takes. Your environment, other people, and chance all play a part, too.

That is why the focus of your daily review before bed should be on the action you took today, not the results you experienced.

How a Box Will Increase Your Energy

Lotte Vesterli on March 31, 2022

Looking at clutter uses energy. Brain scans show that the more objects you have within your field of view, the faster you get tired and lose focus. Even though the brain is capable of filtering out all the items that are not relevant to the task at hand, it does spend energy doing so.

To increase your focus, you need to see fewer objects. But you don’t need to throw anything away (unless you want to). You simply need to group items together. Take a number of items that have some relation to each other and put them in a box. Eight pens, a pile of paperclips, a tape dispenser and a pair of scissors become one object when they go into a box.

It is important you can satisfy yourself that the items belong together. Throwing random objects into a box doesn’t trick your brain. It will look at a box it knows contains unsorted junk and continue thinking of all the items in the box. And now you have added an extra item: The box.

Get out some boxes and remove some clutter from your field of vision. You will notice increased clarity and energy. You just might get around to tasks you have been putting off for weeks.

Prepare a Stress Response Anchor

Lotte Vesterli on March 29, 2022

Hitting someone is a bad response. At the Oscars ceremony, one of the hosts made a joke about an actor’s wife, and the actor stormed up on stage and slapped the host in front of 15 million TV viewers. No matter how bad or tasteless the joke, physically hitting out is the wrong way to react.

Instead, prepare a stress response in advance. One powerful technique is called “anchoring” where you connect a physical feeling to an emotional state. Sit in your favorite place, listen to your favorite music and think of all the good things that have happened in your life. As you really feel good, press your thumb against your middle finger. Say in your mind “I am anchoring this good feeling in my body.” Do this several times on different days.

When faced with a stressful situation in the future, you can call upon your anchor. Touch your thumb against your middle finger and you will feel the calm you have stored in advance. If you see Will Smith, feel free to pass this tip to him.

Keep a Journal

Lotte Vesterli on March 24, 2022

If I asked you, could you find out what you did last Thursday? People who are feeling stuck and unhappy with their lives often complain that each day looks like the previous one. That is not correct. Each day is different, but you just don’t notice.

Like your phone and your computer, our brains do not have unlimited memory. That is why your brain doesn’t store every detail of every day. Similar days get lumped together in your memory, which is why last Thursday might have ended up the bucket of “normal workday” without any details.

To overcome this feeling, keep a journal. Every day write down something good that happened, or something you learned. When you feel stuck, page through your journal and recollect all the things that did happen, and all the learning and growth you did experience.

I talk a lot more about journaling in my book “Life after Bullying.” Read more about my book here.

Try a Less Smart Phone

Lotte Vesterli on March 22, 2022

Have you considered a ‘dumbphone’? We all have smartphones in our pockets full of apps to entertain and distract us. 15 years ago, we had phones that could only make calls and send text messages. More and more people are returning to simpler phones. They find that it gives them more focus and more creativity, and they spend more time with friends.

I still have a smartphone. But I also have a very simple phone I take with me when I head to our summer cottage for my annual silent retreat, or simply to spend time focused on something. With my simple phone, I am not totally isolated. But everything that happens in the world and on social media must wait until I am back home. Try buying a second-hand simple phone and spend one day a week with just that. The change can be dramatic.

Stop Your Technology from Distracting You

Lotte Vesterli on March 18, 2022

To create something, you need focus. I do my journaling on paper because a sheet of paper will not suddenly interrupt you with an unimportant message. When I am in focus mode, I have notification off on my phone and my computer. When writing on the computer, I use the “focus” mode in Word that removes all the menus and covers everything on my screen but the document.

You need to take a moment to figure out how to bend your technology to your will. If you can’t figure out how to disable notifications and noise, have a friend or family member help you.

Overcome the Effects of Bullying

Lotte Vesterli on March 15, 2022

The science about the effects of bullying is piling up, and it is bad. A recent paper in the Harward Review of Psychiatry showed that a girl who has been bullied is 27 times more likely to have a panic disorder as a young adult. A boy who has been bullied is 18 times more likely to attempt suicide.

Fortunately, there are also very effective methods to overcome the long-term effects of bullying and other psychic trauma. There is not much scientific research yet, but with the RIM method I use, almost every client has experienced a significant improvement with just three to five sessions. I am a Master RIM practitioner and RIM Trainer, and I would love the opportunity to tell you more. Please schedule a free call with me online.

You can also read about the RIM method on my website.

Make a donation

Lotte Vesterli on March 10, 2022

You can make a difference. When watching terrible situations like the war in Ukraine, we want to help. However, we are often overwhelmed by the options and end up doing something useless. Charities are drowning in used overcoats and donated toys that there is no way to get to Ukraine.

Unless you have personal contacts in a disaster area, donate money to an organization you already know, like your church or the International Red Cross. Money can be used for whatever is necessary, and the brave people on the ground know if the highest need is for food, medicine, shelter, or transportation.

Making a donation you know will be useful is the best way to fight your anxiety about the state of the world.

Build Bullying Resilience

Lotte Vesterli on March 8, 2022

Bullying is now a criminal offense in France. There are high fines and the penalties for the most severe bullying go up to ten years in jail. More important than the penalties is the additional teacher training that the new law also provides.

Anti-bullying laws and rules are necessary, but they are only one small part of the fight against bullying. We cannot force the bullies to seek the therapy they need, but we can make sure that bystanders are encouraged to step in. And we can give those at risk of becoming victims tools to improve their self-esteem to prevent bullying from happening. You can find many of the most powerful tools I have found in my book Life after Bullying.